Is it possible to beat cancer? Let's defeat cancer! My history. I have strength
To be honest, I was intrigued: “I wonder what he wants to talk about? Meeting with aliens? Climbing Everest? Reuniting with a lost brother after 30 years?
We met the next day, and Marcel’s story struck a chord with me: he told me how he defeated stage 4 lymphatic cancer, although he was only expected to live for several months.
Three things immediately struck me. Firstly, his awareness. He is sure that cancer came into his life because he created it. Your attitude to life and behavior. Secondly, his optimism. He persistently calls himself and other cancer patients “sick.” “I sometimes get criticized for this word, but I use it to show that a person who has cancer is simply “sick.” This is a treatable disease like others. There is no need to give up on yourself. We must fight!”
Thirdly, the most important thing is his goal: “It is very important for me now to help other people. Almost all of them give up when they hear the word “cancer”! One thing needs to be conveyed: cancer is curable.”
In general, we had a conversation not about cancer at all, but about real values, the tireless struggle that each of us wages within ourselves, faith, love, the unbearable lightness of being and the laws of life.
Larisa Parfentyeva and Marcel Imangulov, - photo Larisa's Instagram
- Marcel, tell me how it all started?
I practically stopped sleeping and was itching all day long. The skin became rough and turtle-like, but the diagnosis remained unclear. I went to acupuncture, had rectal surgery, was stripped, examined dozens of times, swallowed tubes and tons of pills, went on diets, took hundreds of tests. Nothing helped.
By this time, I had already quit my job and went to the village to visit my grandparents. I was completely exhausted, could not eat, slept only a few minutes a day and constantly jumped up from a sharp itch. I was no longer able to wear clothes because my whole body had turned into an open wound. This hell lasted 11 months. It seems that then I almost lost my mind and, I admit, I almost resigned myself to the fact that I would soon die.
But my loved ones did not give up. One day, my aunt arrived with a professor from RBC, who was retired. I was itching for 11 months, and it took him five minutes to make a diagnosis. Just 5 minutes! The diagnosis was: lymphogranulomatosis, or cancer of the lymphatic system.
I was hospitalized at the oncology clinic, where the diagnosis was confirmed: stage 4 Hodgkin's lymphoma.
- I can’t imagine how you survived all this for 11 months! How did you react when you found out you had cancer?
Now it will probably sound strange, but I was happy! “Hurray,” I thought, “I finally know my diagnosis!” It was a relief because it was clear what to fight.
The doctors said I had a few months left, but I believed that I could recover. Over the past 2.5 years, I have undergone eight rounds of chemotherapy and two rounds of radiation. I was treated in Israel twice. The money was collected by everyone. I worked as a bartender for six years, and the support of the Russian Bartender Association helped me a lot.
Six months ago I was told that I was in remission. In my case, this means that the foci of cancer that remain are “sleeping.” And I believe that I have a chance to live to be 80 years old.
Let's talk honestly about the causes of cancer and other diseases. For me, this is a rather controversial and unexplored topic. Most people who are authoritative for me say that all diseases are in our heads, and we largely create them ourselves. Well, plus, of course, external factors: nutrition, bad habits, ecology, and so on. I understand that it’s easy to be healthy and think that everything comes “from your head.”
But I wouldn’t have the courage and confidence to say to a cancer patient’s face a phrase like: “Listen, buddy, change your thoughts, your attitude towards life and the cancer will go away,” because any serious illness is a tragedy, and people in such a situation deserve compassion.
You know, I believe that I “created” cancer 90% myself. In my case, as you rightly said, it is a complex of factors: stress, resentment, self-flagellation, nutrition, improper daily routine, bad habits and the environment.
Let's start in order. Firstly, my younger brother died in 2011, and it was extremely stressful. I suffered from it for two years, and then I started itching.
Secondly, I had the wrong value system, which was imposed by society: “You should be cool, with a cool car, with own business and already make a million at the age of 20.”
When it all started, I was 23, and I was literally eating myself up from the inside: “You are a loser! You’re already 23, and you don’t even have a car.” I looked around me, at all these fashionable people in nightclubs, at all this show, and I blamed myself for not being successful.
Thirdly, these are personal grievances. Under no circumstances should you keep grievances to yourself, because they corrode you from the inside.
Fourthly, one of the most important factors is the ecology of our region. We can also add here that, according to statistics, Russia consistently ranks at the top of the rankings for cancer diseases in the world.
Fifth, I worked as a bartender for six years. The daily routine was completely disrupted. When people went to work at 7 am, I was just returning from it. Plus poor nutrition and bad habits.
All these factors, to varying degrees - in my opinion - became the cause of my cancer.
- What about genetics?
I know my family for several generations in depth, and not one of them had cancer. If you dig even further, it is very difficult to understand, because cancer began to be diagnosed relatively recently.
- It's clear. Well, you talked to other cancer patients...
Yes, and they are all awesome!
- What do they say about their causes of cancer?
Eat psychological groups support for cancer patients, where you come and tell your thoughts. Most main question, which is asked there: “What do you think is why you have cancer?”
It seems to me that people should be given a reminder at birth that says: “Remember, dissatisfaction with your life and a job you don’t like are the causes of serious illnesses.” And come on, to close this topic about the reasons, the most sensitive question is about sick children. Why do they have it, do you think?
Hard question. My opinion: ecology. Well, plus I recently read a theory that the karma of parents “works” on children.
Yes, there is such a version. One oncologist told me a story about a woman who gave birth to a child - for herself. And she had a “thing”: she was very authoritarian, domineering and constantly said that she wanted “the child to be with her all the time.” As a result, the girl was diagnosed with cancer at the age of 8. And even the doctor said sadly: “Well, I wanted the child to be constantly nearby - now you can’t even leave him for a second.”
You and I are not doctors (and I want to emphasize this), so, of course, we shouldn’t forget about the medical side either. But at the same time, it is very important to remember: what we ourselves do with our lives is perhaps the key reason not only for our illnesses, but also for the illnesses of our children.
Agree.
- Now your goal is to help people cope with this disease and learn not to be afraid?
In the consciousness of the whole country: oncology is an almost guaranteed death. Typically, those who say they have cancer are asked one question: “How long do you have left?” We must learn to perceive cancer as a difficult but surmountable stage.
I have observed so many times in the hospital a relic of the “Soviet” mentality: people who hear the diagnosis of cancer slide down the wall, become depressed and do not want to live. They immediately give up on themselves. This is very dangerous, so the attitude in treatment is very important. A person who has already written himself off can quickly “burn out.”
- What is the most important thing to know about cancer?
That it is not scary and can be cured.
- Who supported you during your illness?
My parents, my girlfriend and friends. I constantly thought that parents who had already lost one son in 2011 should see their grandchildren.
Love is a big motivator, right?
Very much! Moreover, love in the broad sense of the word: from loved ones, others and even strangers. I am very grateful to everyone who supported me! Their faith in me and warmth were powerfully charged. And my girlfriend and I recently broke up.
- And why?
I think there are two reasons for this. Firstly, she was under stress for a long time because of my illness and, I think, was very tired. Secondly, a man always wants to look strong in the eyes of his woman. And knowing that your girlfriend saw you as weak is very difficult. And it greatly corrodes from the inside. Well, there is one more reason: I am a catastrophically jealous owner.
![](https://i1.wp.com/blog.mann-ivanov-ferber.ru/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/image032.png)
You are right, because a lot of couples break up after experiencing “tragedies”. People can't handle being seen by another person as lost, crushed, or weak. Moreover, these can be not only diseases, but also stages when one of the partners cannot realize himself for a long time and becomes angry and irritable.
Exactly, a lot of couples fall apart because of this.
- Why do you think cancer is considered almost a death sentence in our society?
This is a completely wrong idea! I have friends who a year ago were at the fourth stage of the disease, and today they already have families and children. Of course, many who were treated with me died, but a disproportionately larger number of those who recovered. In general, we all became very friendly. No one will understand you as well as someone who is going through the same thing.
- How should you behave if you loved one found cancer?
Firstly, do not feel sorry for him under any circumstances. Secondly, do not look at him with the eyes of a plaintive dog, do not show weakness, do not cry and do not hit the wall. Thirdly, you need to be confident in his recovery. If you are solid as a stone, then he himself will believe it.
- What do you advise healthy people?
First of all, don’t neglect your health. In Russia we have this mentality: until something starts to fall off, we don’t go to the hospital. Secondly, don’t push yourself too hard and don’t look for something that doesn’t exist. Some people who read my story about itching think they have cancer at the slightest scratch. Remember that itchy skin is a symptom of many diseases. Thirdly, all problems can be solved. There are no hopeless situations.
- What would you say to the sick, or rather, “sick”?
The most important thing is to believe in yourself and fight. Still be open to those who want to help. Many people immediately close themselves off and become hermits. You need to do everything not to think about the disease, to somehow be distracted. I found the ideal remedy for myself: I constantly communicated with different people.
- Now, several months later, do you think your illness gave you more or took away more?
Of course, she gave more.
Now the beauty of the world is perceived much more sharply. Today I planted a tree in a country village, and then lay down on the grass and looked at the clear sky. I heard the leaves rustling, the wind blowing, I felt it all so deeply and so strongly. I didn't notice this before I got sick. I was so happy just lying on the grass and looking at the dandelions.
I stopped getting nervous over little things and became more tolerant. For example, before, if someone stepped on my foot, I could start to sort things out, but now I’m ready to be the first to apologize.
I also have iron patience. I've spent the last three years sitting in endless lines, so I've learned to take my time. I understood an important law of life: “No matter where you are, your turn will still come on time.”
And here's another. I began to prioritize differently. For example, in the past, if I was in a hurry to get to a meeting and encountered a woman with a stroller who needed help, I would pass by because I was in a hurry. And now I can't pass by. I’d rather be late for the meeting, but help the person.
Great! You know, Sonya Lyubomirskaya, a psychology professor at the University of California, conducted a study and found that helping other people cures depression. What are your plans for your future life?
Well, I already planted the tree. All that was left was a house and a son. I would also like to write a book that will help someone.
![](https://i2.wp.com/blog.mann-ivanov-ferber.ru/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/image015.png)
- As for the book, I’ll tell you how it’s done. My book “100 Ways to Change Your Life” is coming out in June. And your story will be included in the second part of the book.
Even at the beginning you said that we live in a world of inverted values. How has your value system changed now?
People are ready to spend a lot of money on “wraparound”: a cool phone, a car, pretentious restaurants. At the same time, they sit on buckwheat and do not feel satisfied with life. We don’t notice the world around us, we don’t pay attention to people, we get angry. We are moving in the wrong direction.
I think that you need to invest in impressions, in travel, in the mountains, in nature. Just today I realized that I’m wearing torn sneakers, but I don’t care. I don’t have an iPhone or a car and, you know, I’m happy. Now I feel like I'm truly alive.
Oh, remember the movie “Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door”? The heroes, who had a couple of days left to live, escaped from the hospital to look at the sea, because they had never seen it...
Certainly! This is one of my favorite films. When I was sick, I also thought that I had never seen the sea in my life. But my dream, fortunately, came true during treatment in Israel. I even wrote a letter to Til Schweiger.
- What did you write about?
About living in his film.
- I can’t help but ask this question: is it scary that today could be the last day?
Each of us - both sick and healthy - today may be the last day of life. Of course, sometimes such thoughts pop up. No one is immune, but there is even some kind of romance in this, because this is what allows me to smile like crazy every day and love this world like the last time.
If you had the opportunity to live your life again...
- I would leave everything as it is.
Do you still think that your problems are unsolvable?
upd: The book “100 ways to change your life” is already on sale! It contains even more motivation and inspiration. Under the cover - new unpublished “methods”, a concentrate of 1000 books on self-development and dozens real stories. Dream. Do it. Change.
Do you think we can defeat cancer?
I am glad to welcome you, my name is Tatyana Panyushkina. No matter how you answer this question, I want to assure you that we will defeat cancer! I'll tell you mine personal history.
This year, in 2018, I turned 64 years old. But today I am much happier and more energetic than 20 years ago.
At the age of 42, I had to endure serious stress, which began my path to a happy life and health. The situation was related to the financial sector and my personal life. I have a strong predisposition to cancer in my family, both on my father’s and mother’s sides.
Cancer killed two of my brothers, two aunts, three sisters, and my mother also had to suffer from this disease. She underwent treatment for six months and received a disability group. But she practiced herbs and treated herself on her own, so she lived a long life for more than 30 years.
Return to yourself. At 42 years old, I began to feel that something was wrong in the genitourinary area. I had to endure all this for two years, but the pain intensified and the discomfort did not go away. I drove away bad thoughts from myself and did not think that it could be oncology. Therefore, I took no action.
During this period, my mother passed away, the disease began to develop very quickly. I had to go to the doctors, and by ambulance they brought me to the hospital in a semi-fainting state. The doctors conducted an examination, a biopsy and gave me a terrible diagnosis. I was asked to have an urgent operation.
I had to agree and stay in the hospital. Next I faced chemotherapy and long treatment, then disability. A standard cable car that many people have passed through.
These thoughts did not leave me the entire first night when I was in medical institution. At this time, I remembered my mother, who, after the doctors, switched to self-medication with the help of prayers, various techniques, herbs, and spells. She knew this from her grandmother, who was a healer in her time.
My mother told me that without such treatment she would not have been able to live for so long. If something like this happens to me, I shouldn’t agree to surgery and chemotherapy. She did not undergo surgery; she only had to undergo chemotherapy. Mom said that this was too much. I remembered that there were notes from my mother and grandmother in the old box.
I'm practically not afraid of anything, so I decided quickly. I always believed in my mother, although she was not a literate person, she was a smart and wise woman. She told me many secrets about treatment various diseases. I wrote down the recipes from her words. She also took notes, illiterately, but you can make them out. I have the originals, as well as what I copied for my mother.
Without waiting for the morning, I knew that I would definitely leave. So I did, despite all the obstacles. At my request, my twelve-year-old son brought me clothes to the hospital. I left. From all my mother’s notes, I chose those that related specifically to oncology and put them into action.
I had to change my entire lifestyle, nutrition, attitude to events, my own emotions and behavior. I searched and collected herbs, applied all the recommendations that my mother left me. There were conspiracies, special technologies, and much more.
My results
What have I achieved? I have already said that cancer can be treated. This has been confirmed: any disease (oncology is no exception) begins with emotions.
And this is the area of life that is amenable to change on our part. This means that we can change our own attitude towards the disease. Even in the East they said that if you call your enemy by his true name, then you can rule over him. We should not be afraid of oncology and name it in order to defeat it. Also in the East they say that as long as a person moves, he lives. We are moving, so we can cure cancer. As long as we live, it is possible to find a way out of any situation.
Today I am healthy. I think this is because I left the hospital on time. This is my personal decision. At that moment I decided: I will never go to a medical institution, I will not go to a hospital or a clinic.
20 years have already passed, and I don’t remember any hospitals. I feel that my health has become even stronger than it was at that moment. Previously, I suffered from colds and even diseases such as hemorrhoids, I encountered problems with the liver, large intestine, and kidneys. Illnesses overtook me periodically. Today there is no need to even remember this.
And I advise you not to lose heart, to use every opportunity provided by fate. There is no need to be afraid of life situations. As long as we live and breathe, we can handle absolutely everything. Be sure of this. I had to work a lot with people, I studied Chinese medicine, I know many conspiracies, technologies that make it possible to find a way out of any life situation. Don't miss a single opportunity.
And if you took something valuable from my story, if you want to receive new videos on the topic of cancer prevention and remission, be sure to subscribe to my YouTube channel link. Like, leave your comments, write what else worries you about this topic. I will definitely make such videos and will definitely answer your questions.
Tatyana Panyushkina was with you. Looking forward to seeing you in the next issues! Bye bye!
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When I was diagnosed with breast cancer at the age of 29, I already knew something about life. For example, that cancer is, of course, a complex and insidious disease, but it can be treated quite successfully. And if it works for many people, it will definitely work for me too. Because who, if not me - a young mother of two children (motivation - one!), an energetic optimist (positive attitude - two!), delving into details and capable of organizing quality treatment (common sense - three!) - can cope with this?
I had experience working in different projects and a rough idea of how to act. We set a goal, set a deadline, work hard - and at the end we get a beautiful and successful project codenamed “I beat cancer!”
The world actively supported me. It was as if he had woken up after a long period of oblivion and finally admitted: cancer really can be defeated. They began to be heard from everywhere big stories success - the stars told in interviews how they fought and won, the Instagram feed was overgrown with the hashtags #I woncancer, #cancerfool. I absorbed these stories so eagerly that there was no doubt - of course I could. Now I will undergo a course of chemotherapy, then surgery, radiation - and that’s it. And that same life will begin - in the rays of the well-deserved glory of the winner, with bonuses in the form of knowing the true happiness of being here and now. I will no longer care about trifles and quarrels, I will gain a strong and lasting understanding of the value of the moment... This will all happen immediately as soon as I win, but for now I have to grit my teeth and fight.
I used to think that people either die from cancer or win. It was unclear where I ended up
I missed the deadline by a few weeks. Before the final operation, with which my new happy life was supposed to begin, I was diagnosed with a relapse.
Then, for the first time after the diagnosis, I seriously and for a long time fell into the abyss of despair and misunderstanding.
I was prescribed a new course of chemotherapy, then another, and another... Soon I lost count, completely burned my veins, installed a port for administering “chemo,” shaved off my slightly grown hair and realized that this was probably going to last for a long time. And after a couple more years, liters of medications and several unsuccessful operations, I finally realized: not for long. Forever.
I used to think that people either die from cancer or win. It was unclear where I ended up. I was still alive - I still raised children in the same way, I was happy to tears when short hair turned into a convincing square, she continued to work as much as she could. But I never won - the disease timidly hid from new therapy, then, having sat in the shadows and gained strength, she again went on the offensive.
It so happened that in this difficult period of treatment for cancer, which they prefer to quickly forget about, I now had to place my whole life.
“You will win!”, “You are strong!” - friends write to me on social networks. And if something goes wrong, they will write: “She fought to the last, but the disease turned out to be stronger.” This is the best case scenario. At worst, this happens if a person consciously chooses to spend last days with loved ones, and not torturing herself with useless therapy in the hospital - they will definitely add that “she, unfortunately, gave up.”
But what exactly is beating cancer? From a physiological point of view, a long-term remission, when control examinations did not reveal symptoms of the disease, can be considered a victory. In the case when remission lasts more than five years, we can talk about a complete cure, although doctors prefer not to use this formulation: it is impossible to predict whether a relapse will occur and in what time frame. It depends on various factors - type of tumor, form of cancer, stage, age, treatment regimen, condition of the body. The right attitude and the desire to live - these factors also work in conjunction with others.
In fact, victory over cancer is the result of a lucky coincidence when maximum amount key factors lined up in an even and strong chain. You may desperately want to live, but we cannot influence the location and aggressiveness of the tumor, your own age, or the response of tumor cells to therapy. It is impossible to lose or win when it is not about the game at all.
Victory over cancer is too relative to be put on a pedestal. I'd rather put life itself there
Over the years of treatment, I have seen different patients. Believe me, there is no pattern. Those who left were bright, strong, courageous, who did not give up for a moment. They also wrote about them later that “they could not win,” but this is not true. I saw it with my own eyes. They won every day when they laughed at some simple things through pain and tears. They won when, on the eve of an important examination, they chatted with friends, cuddled the children, ate deliciously, and watched a great movie. They won when, through the realization that the advantage was on the side of the disease, they found the strength to move forward.
Because there are things that we cannot change. The only thing we can do is change our attitude towards them.
And let the world around us continue to believe in superheroes and wait for the final battle between good and evil, we will no longer allow ourselves to be fooled. This eternal thirst for a miracle, loud applause after a successful death trick distracts us from the main thing - ourselves and our “today”. If we stay there, in the noisy crowd, from which we hear: “Everything will be fine!”, “You will definitely win!”, we risk again believing that the meaning is in this illusory victory, some special day X, when we With our heads held high, we will announce to the world that we have won the war.
But that day may never come. Victory over cancer is too relative to be put on a pedestal. I would prefer to put life itself there - albeit with cancer, even without loud slogans, but the real one, the one that does not have to be written off in the name of announcing the result.
A person who has cancer is forced to fight. Sometimes he gives up, cries, gets tired - he is alive and it’s hard for him
It's time to change the attitude towards cancer - stop making a hero out of it. We are learning to live with it, and this is a sufficient argument to declare a truce. I believe that someday we won’t have to fight at all, we will be able to tame him, but for now... There are us, our children, our lives - weeks, months, years. So why devalue them, aren’t they in themselves an unconditional victory?
A person who has cancer is forced to fight. Sometimes he gives up, cries, gets tired - he is alive and it’s hard for him. He needs tremendous support; it is important for him that people around him understand his condition and respect him. In my opinion, this is much more important than blind faith in miraculous healing. So maybe you should think about your comments? And instead of empty words about “you will definitely win, I have no doubt!” write something honest: “I’m nearby, I’m thinking about you, if you need my help, I’ll help”?
And this will be the best proof of involvement and understanding of someone else’s difficult situation. Then all this will finally stop looking like a boxing match, the outcome of which the audience is eagerly awaiting. Hand over your tickets, we don’t need a full house, we just want to live as long as is measured, and not break our faces until they bleed, so that we can be called winners. Because we have already won - when we realized that our uniqueness today is too good to sacrifice it for the sake of a ghostly tomorrow.
about the author
The floor goes to our expert, surgeon-oncologist, doctor of medical sciences, professor Vyacheslav Egorov .
Anyone diagnosed with a malignant tumor needs to take five life-saving steps.
Step one.
Find out and write down an accurate diagnosis, and then collect all the information about your disease: full name and stage of the disease; type, grade of malignancy and location of the tumor; the meaning of all medical terms related to diagnosis and treatment; results of blood tests, tumor microscopy, examinations - ultrasound, CT, MRI, PET.
Step two.
Gather all the information about treatment options for your tumor type and stage.
Namely about:
- What is included in the “gold standard” of her chemotherapy and surgical treatment?
- How effective modern methods treatments for your disease and have new ones appeared, and are they currently undergoing clinical trials in our country?
Step three.
Look for a “second opinion”. Be sure to consult with another doctor you trust.
To make the doctor’s opinion objective, provide him with all the information about your illness. After studying the recommendations of both specialists, you will be able to evaluate the treatment method proposed to you more carefully.
Step four.
Choose (if possible) a medical facility where treatment is provided in strict accordance with international recommendations.
If there are clinical trials of new drugs for the treatment of your tumor type, try to take part in them.
If you need surgery, choose your surgeon carefully! Surgeries for cancerous tumors are usually complex and lengthy - they often involve complete or partial removal of any organs (for example, the pancreas or stomach), as well as lymph nodes. The result of surgery depends on the doctor's experience in this field.
Step five.
Stay positive!
Do what pleases you: watch good films and plays, play different games, walk around beautiful places, draw, sing songs, go to the cinema and stadiums, learn what you have long dreamed of learning... There will definitely be an activity that will lift your spirits! Fight for yourself! Knowledge, optimism, the will to win and the support of loved ones are the right path to recovery.
By the way
There is a chance to recover even at stage IV cancer. An example of this is the story of the American Richard Bloch. In 1978, he was informed: you have the last stage of lung cancer, you have three months to live. The patient and his relatives began to fight with all their might... Two years later, not even traces of a malignant tumor were found in Bloch’s body. After his recovery, Richard and his wife Annette dedicated themselves to saving cancer patients and founded a foundation to help patients with cancer. When Richard passed away in 2004 (not because of cancer, but because of heart failure), Annette took over the foundation. In the USA, in the city of Minneapolis, there is a park that was once created by Annette and Richard. As you walk along it, you can read survival instructions for patients diagnosed with cancer. They were compiled by Richard Bloch himself based on his own experience of defeating a terrible disease.
Another American Lance Armstrong He won the most famous cycling race on the planet - the Tour de France - 7 times. No one has yet been able to repeat this record. In 1996, the athlete, who was only 25 years old, was diagnosed with testicular cancer, with metastases to the lungs, abdominal cavity and brain. There was a 20% chance of life. The patient underwent several operations and decided to test it for himself new method chemotherapy and... recovered. And then he created the Lance Armstrong Foundation to help those with cancer, and returned to sports activities. A little later, Lance won the first of seven victories in the world's main cycling races.
A disease that always takes you by surprise
Shortly before I found out about my diagnosis, my husband and I underwent a medical examination - we needed to obtain a conclusion from the guardianship authorities in order to become candidates for adoptive parents. Before that, we were regular volunteers at a boarding school, but at some point we realized that if you really want to help a child, you need to take him home. As a result of all the examinations, nothing was found in me. I basically felt great.
Two months later, when we had the cherished conclusion in our hands, I felt a small lump in my chest. Despite the fact that my husband advised me to immediately go to the hospital, I hesitated. Instead, I shared my problem with my friend. She said that it was a cyst - you need to tie a down scarf and everything will resolve itself. I naively believed and did as she said, but on the second or third night I felt hot, and when I took off my scarf, I discovered that the lump had grown in size in a few days, and another one had formed in my armpit. - I had no idea where the oncology clinic was in our city. Apart from the maternity hospital where I gave birth to three children, I had no exposure to medicine at all and knew nothing except aspirin and activated charcoal. Photo: from Svetlana’s personal archive When I came to the doctor, he examined me and became alarmed. From the fear in his eyes, I realized: this is not just a bump. I was given a referral to a mammologist at the oncology clinic. There, an elderly woman oncologist said that cysts do not form in the armpits and that my case was something more complex. The next day they took a puncture from me and told me to come back in a week for the results. They didn’t scare me, but fear settled inside. I didn’t understand what was happening, but I thought everything would pass, now everything is being treated. When I came for a diagnosis, the doctor saw me and said that everything was bad and that the breast needed to be completely removed, and as soon as possible. To say that I was shocked is to say nothing. It probably sounded stupid, but I asked - what will happen there then? The doctor answered me: “Scar.” Without looking up, she gave me a list of doctors I had to see before the surgery. I left her office and sat down on a bench in the hallway in tears.
It was the very beginning of December 2010 - the first snow fell. I don’t remember how I got to the clinic - my husband, whom I immediately called, was there. We had already gone to the orphanage, looked after the boys, and I didn’t know what to do now. My husband suggested taking a break and said: “Don’t worry and don’t be afraid to have your breasts removed. Many women live without it - there is nothing wrong with that. The main thing is to stop the process. The main thing is that you live." Photo: from Svetlana’s personal archive Despite the fact that I managed to pass all the tests and undergo all the examinations in four days, I hesitated for a long time whether or not to go for the operation. I read that there are many different ways treatment and thought about being treated with celandine or mushrooms. I thought about trying a different diet, gastric lavage, and some unconventional methods of therapy. But since I am a deeply religious person, I decided to go to church. There they told me to agree to the operation. They prayed for me, anointed me with oil - and I went to the hospital.
I didn’t negotiate with anyone, I didn’t know any of the doctors, I didn’t have a quota - I went to a regular Oryol hospital. There were three children left at home, and deep down I understood that there are things that depend not on doctors, but on God. I trusted him completely and did not look for acquaintances or make any connections. When I was examined again, before the operation, the oncologist-surgeon said that it might be possible to save my breasts.
A place where no one sleeps
You know, almost no one sleeps there at night. Everyone is crying - everyone is going over their lives and thinking. He thinks a lot. There are no unbelievers there - everyone clings to God as the only, last and most correct hope. At night, when I wanted to howl into my pillow, I simply read the Psalter or Holy Bible. It helped me. - They love you very much. Everyone is trying to help and support, but they are all on the other side of life, behind the door. They are visitors, and you are sick. It's very scary. Sometimes you wake up in the morning, look out the window - the sun is there, the weather is beautiful - and you think how good it is. And then one day you remember: you have cancer. This thought did not leave me for about a year. I was basically wondering if there would ever come a time when I wouldn’t think about it. And now - when seven years have passed - I wake up and no longer think about the fact that I am sick. Photo: from Svetlana’s personal archive I underwent six chemotherapy sessions, 25 radiotherapy sessions, and two years of hormone therapy. I added 15 kilograms to my normal weight- at first I had bruises on my sides because I couldn’t fit into the corners, getting used to my new body. I am grateful to fate that six months later - during chemotherapy - I ended up in the group " Women Health" Supporting people who have experienced all the horrors of the disease is worth a lot. These women know what nausea after chemotherapy, baldness, and awkwardness in the pool due to the shortcomings of their own body are like. But the main thing is that I saw women who live after the diagnosis. Some for three years, some for five years, some for seven. Returning home after the first such meeting, I told my husband - if I live at least five years and we do not take a single child, I will look back on every day I live with longing, because I lived it in vain. After all, even if I leave in five years, this child will already have something to remember. Even these five years are important for him. They are better than life in an orphanage.
Everything came together like a puzzle - my husband and I came to the orphanage and met two brothers there. Then I asked my husband the question “Are you sure? Because if something happens to me, you will remain a widower not with three children, but with five.” He said, “Yes, I take full responsibility.” This is how we had our first adopted children. - Sometimes they tell us that we are great - we gave our children a family, warmth, and comfort. But what children gave us is real happiness. They gave us hope and the opportunity not to cry for ourselves, but to help others. Photo: from Svetlana’s personal archive Now, seven years later, my main occupation is being a mother of 12 children. My husband and I adopted nine children. Our children accepted the babies with open hearts, realizing that everything was behind us - we had defeated the disease (and yes, I lived to see my eldest daughter’s wedding). In addition, I am an active volunteer in the Women's Health group. Every two weeks we go with the girls to meet women who have just had surgery. They are still sitting with “eggplants”, with eyes wet from tears - they are just going through all this. We share our stories with them, tell them that there is life after cancer and that the disease must be defeated in three components: spirit, soul and body. There is no need to ignore doctors’ orders and think that grandmothers and medicinal herbs will help. No, they will only make things worse. I also had a moment of “trading” - not accepting the diagnosis. I thought maybe I ended up here by accident. And when I was prescribed chemotherapy, I initially refused. Instead of treatment, I went to Moscow - to a doctor I trusted. She double-checked all the data again and made exactly the same diagnosis as the doctors in Orel. Then she asked me why I refused therapy. I answered - I’m scared, I feel sorry for the liver, which is being destroyed by medications, and I feel sorry for my thick long hair. To this the doctor told me: “On one side of the scale lies your life, on the other - beautiful hair. If you are going to die, why do you need beautiful hair in your coffin? If you die, then what difference does it make to you whether you die with a diseased liver or with a healthy one?” This became a kind of push, a sobering moment - I returned home and the next day I went to my first chemotherapy. Now I undergo examinations every year - this is necessary for me and my peace of mind.
Sometimes oncologist psychologists and sometimes operating doctors come to our Women’s Health group, plus we have free exercise therapy for hand development. The Volnoe Delo charitable foundation, which supports us, pays for our theater tickets (we even had a trip to the Voronezh Dolphinarium). It's great when you feel the shoulder of a person who is in the same boat with you. After all, among the patients there are administrators, bosses, and bank employees who cannot tell anyone about their diagnosis for fear of losing their jobs. Unfortunately, not everyone in our country still treats oncology calmly and with understanding. - For us there is no patronymic, no age, no position - only a name. We communicate like sisters, friends who went through the same life situation and survived. There are moments when people leave, and nothing can be done about it. We understand everything and do not hide our heads in the sand. Photo: from Svetlana’s personal archive Photo: from Svetlana’s personal archive We definitely need to fight. You need to reconsider your goals and determine what you did not have time to accomplish. Do it for real - without tinsel, with the understanding that time is limited. At the same time, you need to understand that there are things that are beyond your control. You can't schedule and plan everything. The disease spares no one - it always takes you by surprise. There is no one who would be ready for it.
Someone said: cancer patients are the most happy people. No matter how scary and strange it may sound, there is some truth in this. Illness is an opportunity to rethink a lot, think about a lot and prepare. We will all face the Court sooner or later. However, cancer can be defeated. You need to gather all your willpower and fight. Yes, treatment is not as fast a process as we would like, but the sooner it starts, the better. I regret that I didn’t go to the hospital earlier, I regret that I tried to self-medicate, I regret that I never had a mammogram. Much could have been avoided. If a person undergoes examinations and monitors his health, it will be easier for him to recover - he will be able to live wiser, more real life. As part of the World Breast Cancer Month, the Women's Health charity program of the Volnoe Delo Foundation and Philips continue to engage in the all-Russian social initiative #YAPROSTLA. In October, an original film by Leonid Parfenov and Katerina Gordeeva about the fight against breast cancer was released (you can watch it HERE) and free diagnostic examinations were organized for women throughout Russia. Details of the social campaign against breast cancer #I'M PASSED can be found on the Philips website. Related Articles People with cerebral palsy are subject to invisible but tangible discrimination. They don’t understand us, and as a result, they are afraid. Zhenya Smirnov: “Since I survived, it means I can cope with everything.” Alena Alyokhina: “I do the impossible every day” The story of a man who beat cancer, survived a heart transplant and did IRONMAN
Entry “Cancer patients are the happiest people.” The story of a woman who beat cancer and adopted 9 children first appeared on The-Challenger.ru.